So it’s been a minute since I’ve actually written a blog post. My primary spots have been over on Instagram & Facebook. But honestly, it’s because things have been quiet, or actually, I think things have been so loud in my head, to sit down long enough to write more than a quick post has felt extremely difficult. However, I had a clear thought this morning that I feel strongly to share. I know I am not alone in this boat and others need to hear what I have to say today.
Am I enough?
I’m in a weird spot lately. Not feeling a sense of belonging in my circles. Feeling lost. I told my husband last night that I feel like I’m just floating about wandering aimlessly in my world. But it wasn’t until this morning that I had a thought that helped me reframe the cloud of thoughts that I’ve been struggling with lately.
If I only could [insert a negative thought] then I’d be enough…
If I only could lose 10 lbs, then I’d look good enough to post more pictures of myself.
If I only could be more bold, then I’d fit in enough for feel accepted.
If I only could be less anxious, then I’d feel productive enough….I could go on and on really.
But do you feel me? Am I speaking your language? Those moments of just not feeling like you’re enough.
I’ve worked really hard over the years to build up my self-esteem and confidence, so to hear such negative thoughts about myself only seems to perpetuate self-loathing and lower my self-esteem. It’s a vicious cycle. So, this morning when I caught myself speaking such negativity to myself, I really had to take a step back and reflect on some truth.
I am enough, I always enough, and so are you. Whether I am feeling down on myself, whether I gained 10 pounds when I’m trying to lose 10 pounds, whether I feel left out and lost, whether I feel unworthy…I am enough.
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.2 Corinthians 12:9 (NIV)
In 2 Corinthians, Paul’s letter is to attempting to ease the minds of the church in Corinth of Christ’s goodness. All the while though, Paul himself was experiencing lows. He was imprisoned, he was almost stoned to death, he had mistreated those he was ministering to out of frustration, people were questioning his legitimacy. Dude was driving the struggle bus (I feel you , Paul).
Here’s the beauty in it all though, 2 Corinthians 12:9, “my grace is sufficient for you” was the Lord’s response to Paul’s plead to take the pain away. Verse 8 states “Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me.” The response, God’s grace is enough. Verse 10: “That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
We are enough because He is enough. Everything we face, every weakness we encounter, can rest in Christ’s power. He has given up everything for us, so that we never have to question whether we are enough. That battle has already been won.
The other day I couldn’t get this thought out of my head: Only the weakest survive, not the strongest, which is the complete opposite of what society tells us. As I write this post I have had this ‘ah ah’ moment of realizing that God was speaking truth to me, but I couldn’t put the pieces together until today.
Those moments of not feeling like enough are the very moments that we are to seek God’s grace, and it is in Christ that we find that. Our weakest moments are the very moments that we will grow.
So if you need to hear it today, say it out loud: I am enough because He is enough.
I am enough.